Tearing Away From Destiny

The beginning
This boy had a happy life in the village. Known and loved by everyone, the whole village was his. The fields, the rivers, the cool winters, sleeping out under the stars, the whole landscape was home. Day after day, he tended to the fields, noon was siesta time, and evenings were a get together at the center of the village – bursting with news, gossip, laughter, followed by a hearty dinner and a peaceful sleep with the knowledge that he was safe, life was full of contentment and there was nothing more to ask for.

The beginning of the end
And as the wheels of life turn, he turns away from all this. He sets out to discover the city of Bombay, prosper and give his family a ‘modern’ life. Life is a roller coaster ride. Strokes of deceit, resentment and retreat paint themselves on the canvas of life.
The struggle, the compromises, the routine were eating into him. But by now his children were born in the ‘civilized and evolved’ world and how could he bring them back to the village where higher education was unheard of? So he dragged on, the only respite was the visit to his homeland every year.Was this evolution or dissolution?

I have often wondered about the choices life offers and the ones we take or shy away from. What is the fear within us that we dare not do something drastic lest it disturb the ‘balance’? Is life merely a sequence of neat balanced steps? If I loved something, would i go all out and pursue it? And if i didn’t, just to keep ‘my’ set of people happy, would they be really happy, or would they be weighed down by all the compromises that were made for them?
I know the answer to the last one...it does weigh you down, knowing that people tried to change their life for you.

Tearing away from destiny.....
Sometimes questions are knotted enough to make you want to tear away from everything. I know I am like a thread woven intricately in the cloth that is trying to tear away. In doing so, I risk losing the identity I began with. But there is a part of me that want to tear away, not have any roots and just live like a newborn, forgetting each day, not feeling the need to stack memories, form experiences and create meaning out of these. Just breathing in every moment and letting it die...just that..and nothing else...Isn’t the thought of that so comforting ?